I had a Doctor's appointment that morning. We were 99.9% certain a delivery would happen that afternoon, but we wanted to do a quick sonogram to check how low the fluid levels were since that is a re-occurring chronic problem I have with pregnancy. Sure enough, there was one small pocket of fluid - and it just seemed to be time. Since we were pretty certain that would be the case, we had packed and arranged child care for the 3 girls ahead of time. We left the doctors office, ran a few errands, and headed up to the hospital around 10:45 am - expecting surgery would take place "around lunch time."
I got my IV, filled out paperwork, answered about 4989879234 questions, and began being pumped full of fluids. (I really hate that, because it causes me to swell up like crazy after delivery). We sat around and waited for the anesthesiologist to come in and go over everything with me. When he finally did, he informed me that my doctor was downstairs doing a quick surgery on someone else, and that the other OB in town was doing a c-section in the OR I was assigned too. It was going to be just a little bit longer.
Also, because I had been low on iron during my entire pregnancy, they needed to do a hemoglobin count - so they drew my blood. The LOW end of normal for hemoglobin is 12 - in a pregnant woman, its common to see it go to a 10. Mine was at a 7. Much too low. They began me on a blood transfusion prior to surgery. Waiting went on a bit longer. It takes 2-3 hours for the bag of blood to go all the way through. I finished an entire bag before surgery. A nurse then came in and told me that there had been a gallbladder surgery that had just taken place, and the recovery nurse on duty was with that person while they recovered. Of course, that person gets very ill during recovery and keeps the nurse tied up a bit longer. We would not be able to begin surgery until she was free from that person, and able to come up to assist in my recovery. Finally, at 6:35 pm, after being at the hospital since 10:45 am - (and not having been able to eat anything since dinner the night before!) They took me back for surgery. They gave me my spinal, laid me down, sent for Tyler to come in - and got right to work.
I was super aware this time of what was going on. Every other time I have done this - I have let my anxiety take over and kind of gone into "flight mode". This time, not so much. I was beginning my 2nd bag of blood during surgery, and I don't know if that had some sort impact on my being more aware or what - but I was. I was calm, thanks to Tyler being there with me talking me through it all. They held her up over my curtain, and I immediately recognized her - looked so much like her sisters did as newborns. Her cry was so so so soft. After she was born, and I got to lay my eyes on her for a second, Tyler and her were off to get weighed and measured. At this point, I began feeling a lot of discomfort - not pain - just super super uncomfortable so they gave me some sort of medicine - and sent me off to recovery.
Tyler brought Wynn into my recovery room, and I attempted nursing her - but it did not go well at all. She was breathing much to rapidly to be able to eat comfortably. This is when we realized she was grunting loudly with each breath she took - and the nurse decided to take her to run some quick tests on her. Then they moved us to our room we would be in the remainder of our stay - where I would receive a 3rd and 4th bag of blood. Meanwhile, they monitored her breathing, and found that she was taking around 90 breaths a minute - and normal newborns take about 50. All of this lead them to checking her blood sugar levels - which they also found to be much too low. We had her with us for about an hour before they told us that she needed to be on an IV, and that the reason her cry was so soft and that she was breathing so quickly was because there was still fluid left in her lungs. The breathing leveled out after some time, thankfully, and she did not need to be placed on oxygen - but that was the next step. In order to correct the blood sugar levels, she needed to be on the IV that would pump the meds through to get her levels to a healthy place. I was not able to feed her nearly all of Thursday, and I was devastated. So I pumped colostrum as much as I could for her during those hours. By that evening, though, they let me go to nurse her, but I had to go to the nursery, she could not leave as she was still on the monitor for breathing and hooked up to her IV. On Friday, they took her off the IV, but told me that supplementing with formula was necessary to keep her sugar levels stable without the IV because my milk was not in yet. Her levels dropped off again after we tried going without the formula, so we conceded, and gave small amounts of formula after each time I nursed. As long as she was supplemented, her levels got to consistent, healthy level and she was finally able to come to our room. After she was in our room for a while, her levels dropped AGAIN (they were checking her every 3 hours, prior to being fed - her poor heel has been pricked more times than I can count) and we were told we would be there another 24 hours - at minimum - if her levels stayed stable for those 24 hours.
This was my low point. I spent most of Friday and Saturday bawling my eyes out. I had never had a baby with any kind of complications. I had never had any kind of complications myself - and I was dealing with both of those scenarios this time around. I also gravely missed my other girls. Its so strange, being in the hospital having a new baby, when there is a baby at home. Or 2 or 3 of them at home, in my case.Its hard, because your brain can not fully be with the new baby. You have other babies you are thinking about, and wanting to make sure are being cared for properly. Its just how it goes. I had been discharged at this point, though I was going to be rooming in with Wynn, and using her "room" as like a hotel room until SHE was to be discharged. We took this opportunity to sneak away from the drab walls of the hospital and go see the other girls between feeding times. I of course saw them, and Anslee immediately started crying - wanting us to take her home. I was beyond heartbroken - after about an hour visit, it was time for us to head back to Wynn, and the 3 big girls just cried as we left. We could clearly see how 4 days away from home was starting to get to them, they were as homesick as we were.
We were finally able to leave the hospital on Sunday afternoon around 2 pm, and then our big girls came home around 4:30 that afternoon. We were so happy to be back in our home, and able to sleep in our bed, and so glad to have the girls back under our wing. We missed them so much.
Nursing Wynn was such a challenge, obviously, since we were having to give bottles and she was getting instant gratification from that - but since we have been home, each day has gotten better - and now she is really getting used to it and getting really good at it. I have struggled with nursing my babies in the past so this always makes me anxious. Kens was really the only one who did it well - but now Wynn is joining her club, after a few bumps in the road - and I am so thankful!
Wynn is the sweetest, sleepiest, most precious angel girl that could ever be. She loves to snuggle and be close, very much loves a good swaddle, doesnt care for dirty diapers much, and sleeps so well. In fact, I have to wake up at night to feed her - because I know at this age she needs to eat, but she rarely will wake up on her own to do so. She doesn't really have any awake time yet, during the day, either. I will basically get her up to feed her, change her, and swaddle her and let her go back to sleep. She has fought that maybe 1 or 2 times a day since we got home, but she really enjoys to sleep - and she sleeps very soundly. I hope I am not putting a jinx on myself by saying this!
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With the complications that came along this time, the fact that 4 c-sections is just about all my body can handle, and that we have 4 beautiful, healthy, and happy little girls - we decided that this would most certainly be our last baby. Before finishing up the operation, we had the doctor do a tubal ligation to prevent any further pregnancies. We feel like our family is perfectly complete now, and after much prayerful consideration this was in the best interest of our family. After almost 5 straight years of pregnancy, its strange to think that chapter of my life is closed. I am thrilled to now move forward in raising little women without the distraction and exhaustion that pregnancy (while always a miracle, which is why a part of me will always miss it) can bring on. I hope these 4 sisters always see each other as built in best friends - as that will make the busy-ness of their early years so very worth the effort.
