Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Tales from the Life of a Trooper Wife....

A great friend of mine told me that since I have a blog, I should blog about the experiences I have as a Texas State Trooper's wife. I feel like as Christian women, we are called to support our husbands in their mission field, in their role as fathers, and in their work place. Proverbs 31 paints a very clear picture of what a Holy wife and mother look like. I have to stop sometimes and ask myself, "Why is this concept easy to understand, but hard to actually put into practice sometimes?" I have not met a Christian woman who says that they don't want to look like the woman who is described in the 31st chapter of Proverbs, and I feel like its another one of those things that is much easier said than done.
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I must be honest. I have had my moments over the past year in being wholeheartedly and selflessly supportive of Tyler's job as a Trooper. Since Tyler has been gone, I have had some time to think about how I put the "supportive wife" hat on. I wonder if I really do that good of a job sometimes. I wonder if Tyler is really getting what he truly deserves. Do I REALLY work hard enough at that? While it brings me nothing but pure joy to know that when he goes to work everyday he is enjoying himself and confident that he is good at what he does, its still hard for me at times. As you all know, this blog was started when Tyler had to basically move to Austin for 6 months while I lived in Abilene still. We had been married for 4 months when he left. I found out we were pregnant 2 months after he left. I hated being away from him. I know he hated being away from me too, but he knew this is the profession he was called into. I knew it too. I knew it when we married, but for some reason when you are surrounded by wedding plans, and the excitement of being married, you push the unfavorable realities out of your mind for a while. Though the thoughts of him leaving haunted me, I still had some time to push them out of my mind for a while. Tyler had to again leave for additional training last week, and will be back at the end of this week. Two weeks was nothing compared to the 6 months I had already dealt with, however, this time when he left, I got a little picture of what single motherhood would be like. A whole new experience.

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Don't get me wrong when reading this. I am so proud of my husband and his work. I would not have him do anything else. I am proud to tell others what he does. He is a true public servant, and how can anyone say that is something we should not be proud of! I will say, though, that its hard at times. As a wife, I worry about the dangerous nature of the job and the horrifying things that he has to see. He has worked several fatal crashes and even a murder. So, at times, I worry about how he deals with those things emotionally. Now, law enforcement was not my calling. It was Tyler's. I feel that when we married his calling became mine (and vise versa of course). This is where my trouble lies I think. At times I try to just make that his "thing". Its easy to get upset about certain aspects of his job too. No holidays, or weekends. Night Shifts. There are many things to complain about. I guess I just wonder if other law enforcement wives ever have their days. I have mine, and I won't for one minute claim to be perfect and say that I don't. One thing remains though, and that is that I am so proud of Tyler and happy that he is happy and good at his job. I am so blessed to have found a man that knew what he wanted out of life and went after it. He has accomplished so much, and should be commended for what he has overcome to get to where he is now.
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So proud of that Badge he wears. So with Father's Day coming up, and just thinking about how blessed I am to have him as my husband, this post is dedicated to Tyler. I could not be more blessed and more happy than I am with him (even when I have my days!)

I love you babe!



So this is my tribute to Tyler, All Law Enforcement Officers who serve us everyday, and the wives that are doing their best to support them!

3 comments:

The Jarzombeks said...

You don't know me, but I am Laura McDonald's sister. I saw your blog on hers and the "trooper's wife" comment caught my eye. I, too, am a Trooper's wife, going on 9 years next week. He is now a Sgt. with Motor Vehicle Theft in Midland, which basically took him off of the road, but for the first 7-8 years of our marriage and 10-11 years of our relationship he was on the road. Everything you have expressed is normal and something that ALL DPS wives go through. I have watched many of his friends and colleagues marriages come and go because of how the hard times are handled and I have learned a lot. I just want to reassure you that you are on the right track. Don't deny that you are frustrated, but continue to support him. Talk to him and listen to him. Some of the things he might tell you aren't things you are going to want to hear, but listen anyway and encourage him to talk to you (that will help him deal). Sometimes you do feel like a single parent, the late nights and training that take them from you gets old, but know as I do, that I could never ask him to do anything else. God will take care of the rest. Good luck and know that you are not alone.

The McDons said...

Well, looky there! I was surprised to see my sister commented! Now you see how I make it through some days. I enjoyed your blog! Tyler is so lucky to have you! I'm so lucky we met in that crazy meeting the day before the greatest day in September! :) I'm so glad Jon is back from El Paso, not looking forward to what Tyler just did (Jon goes in September). We just have to stick together!!!

The Jarzombeks said...

Of course you can follow my blog - if I ever post. ha ha. I am glad my "words of wisdom" (ha ha) helped. I have been there for sure. Bryan likes MVT, he is a born investigator, but he really misses the road. He doesn't say it so much, but when he tells stories to others about his experiences, he completely lights up in a different way. The schedule is so much better with MVT, for family anyway.
I know what you mean about the network of Trooper's wives, when he was in Odessa we had a great close-knit group. Somewhat like Laura has now, but when we transferred to Floresville to be closer to his family, there was nothing like that. Bryan missed the commraderie (sp?) as much as I did. But, each step has brought us a new blessing and a new challenge. Since we have been married, we have lived in Odessa, Floresville, El Paso and now Midland. So it has been an adventure to say the least! Thanks for the congrats on the pregnancy. I will turn 34 soon after I have her and I think I am too old for this stuff. Ha. One of my upcoming DPS challenges will be NOT going into labor while Bryan is potentially going to be in Austin 5 days before my scheduled C-section! Wish me luck and good luck with you as well. Your little one is adorable. They are so much fun and so frustrating all at the same time. But, I wouldn't change it for the world.